I sort of knew something was wrong. I had seen pigs before and they seemed, well, big. So, I was surprised I could carry a whole one in my mouth, just like that. And then more things began to feel wrong.... like the taste.... and the texture.... and well, everything!
And suddenly realisation hit me like a streak of bacon in the face - only not at all like bacon in a very important way. It's a toy. 'Amusingly' shaped like a pig. It's an oinking toy, would you believe!? My disappointment was limitless and crushing. As you can imagine, I have not looked at the pig, or the STAFF, since this incident. I am treating all of them with the disdain they deserve.
I know TWO people, who are completely off my Christmas list.