Thursday, 18 October 2007

My woes continue...

Pfff, as if a bad tummy from being force-fed items of clothing (see my earlier post) was not bad enough. Now the STAFF have really done it.

There I was carefully chasing a squirrel. As you would. Full speed, through brambles, tree stumps, undergrowth, spiky conkers and whatnot. Anyway, as I said, carefully chasing a squirrel and I must have grazed my paw somewhat.

Now, I treat all grazes the same. Ancient Weimaraner medicinal wisdom. But I don't mind sharing it with you.

  1. Lick the graze for a few hours (take no breaks)
  2. when the skin begins to soften, start biting the area (carefully and deliberately)
  3. note how the graze is now nice and visible and the skin begins to detach from your paw
  4. repeat Steps 1 - 3 until you are too tired
  5. take a nap and start again
  6. now you'll note a nice big sore area
  7. start limping and look sorry for yourself

Works every time. Or used to work should I say. Look at what the STAFF did to my poor paw. It is never going to heal like that! How can I lick it? How can I bite it?! Just as soon as I have finished dozing in the sun I will take that stupid thing of. Just a couple more minutes....

Note from STAFF: As soon as you notice the execution of Step 1 of ancient Weimaraner medicinal Wisdom, put on a bandage. Do not delay, or a minor scratch will turn into a big sore paw! Sometimes we do know best.

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