Saturday, 27 June 2009

After Dinner Exercises

Every evening needs a bit of entertainment. I have my red ball. Filled with tasty snacks. I trained the STAFF into filling it. The deal is that I go out for a wee after breakfast and dinner - which I don't like (going out I don't like, I love breakfast and dinner!) - and the STAFF fill me my red ball with treats. Yum! 
Come to Otto Schnuff, little Biscuits! Come, come, come. 

When I first got the red ball, I believed the STAFFs' instructions and was running around with it rolling on the floor. But then I quickly realised that you can achieve the same effect whilst lying on the floor, on a soft and warm rug. Without moving much at all. As I have a keen interest in all nutritional matters I know that the fewer calories you burn whilst eating food the more calories you get to keep from the food. Economy of movement is, yet again, a key principle!

The instant the last biscuit has made its way out of the ball and into my chops, I lose interest in that thing completely. Boring! So totally yesterday!

And then the exercises begin. Essentially this training is 101 easy ways to tell the STAFF that you really would care for another biscuit, or two.  As you can imagine, the STAFF took a while to pick up on the general principles, but now it is going ok. 

Here I am demonstrating one easy way of getting a biscuit and exuberant praise: Lie on a comfy rug (couldn't lie on the hard floors, natch! Ordered those soft little wool rugs tailor-made for me!). Anyway, lie there until the STAFF call you. And get a biscuit. Easy.

What is devilishly difficult is a slight variety on the Do-nothing=get-biscuit. Here the STAFF cruelly put a tempting biscuit right in front of you. But you mustn't eat it, NO! THEY get very upset when you do. When you exercise supreme self-control and don't take it, you get that one AND another one. Leaving it is therefore the only rational decision.  

And then, THEY up the ante further by putting snacks on your paws! 

And with 3 tasty snacks, within reach, within sight and smell, you have to wait. 

Sometimes I have to lie there for days! I have the self-control of any Zen master by now.

And when your work is done, the STAFF are rightly proud! And I reward THEM by cuddling up on the sofa for a bit before I retreat to the peace and quiet of my own bed. I need my rest, so that I am ready for the next day. 

My days are filled with fun. 

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